This shall be considered Amendment #3 to the Spousal Immunities and Protections for Sanity (SIPS) Bill of Rights:

The household dog, Sheba, shall retain the inalienable right to patrol the perimeter of the yard and pursue squirrels along the fence line.

This right shall remain protected provided that:

• All gates are securely closed.
• No actual squirrels are harmed.
• The dog remains convinced that victory is possible.
• The caregiver is willing to provide enthusiastic encouragement from a comfortable chair.

Furthermore, it shall be recognized that:

The dog has been conducting these border security operations for years and takes the responsibility very seriously.

The fact that the same squirrels return every day shall not be construed as evidence of mission failure.

Repeated barking at squirrels, birds, leaves, shadows, or suspicious breezes shall be considered protected speech.

Special Provision

Should the spouse with Lewy body dementia become concerned that the dog is “lost,” “escaping,” or “running away forever,” the caregiver shall have full authority to point out that:

1. The dog is still in the yard.
2. The gate is still closed.
3. The dog is exactly where he has been for the last twenty minutes.

This explanation may need to be repeated every three minutes.

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