I didn’t make too big of a deal about it, I just got Matt dressed and ready for his day

We got in the car, I took a different route to get there

When we entered the property, he didn’t say anything much

When we got out of the car, he said “why are we going here?”

The ED came out, welcomed him, was super nice

He had a viseral reaction, he didn’t want to go in that building

She asked why? He said “I didn’t like your attitude”

He refused to step closer to the door, he really was pushing back, when he does that it takes into a different state of mind, its hard to describe

So we had a conversation in the car, he wasn’t going in, he hates the place

I tried to explain that I worry he is sleeping too much, not stimulated enough, his quality of life is what I was concerned about

I tried to explain to him I am nicer to him if I have breaks, he said “that would be nice”

So I turned the car on and we left, he was probably glad to leave, I was disappointed

Hoping to find a replacement situation, we went to the Vintage House

They have a shorter respite program 2 days per week put on by the Council on Aging

We looked at their activities and there is a Rock N Roll trivia later today

I met the couple who puts that on at an event in early December, super nice folk

So we are going to try to go to that Rock N Roll event a bit later

Maybe it will be an intro to this place of resources, but it doesn’t solve my need for 2 more days of respite……

I am grateful my brother is here this week so I have some help

Matt is substantially younger than many in these kinds of programs, maybe in age and definitely in how he thinks about how old he is

He sees a lot of folks his age and older and he just sees old people, not himself

I am disappointed, I don’t want to go back into that dark place I was in in January

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